The game against Wingate and Finchley was absolutely dreadful. Let’s not sugar coat it in any way, this was two poor football teams trying to find ways not to win, with our visitors deservedly winning by virtue of being less bad than the K’s.
Kingstonian were able to get themselves into more advantageous positions than Wingate and Finchley did, but their creativity in messing up in front of goal actually commands some sort of grudging respect. The Blues, on the other hand, didn’t get into the spirit of things and scored an excellent long-range goal to decide the game with fifteen minutes remaining.
Our defence actually looked ok, which is a plus, but once again if a midfield and forward line misfire so spectacularly as they did on Saturday, one error is going to be game changing. Defences cannot operate properly with that in mind.
And so out comes the glass-half-empty in me. We haven’t won in the league since the first week in January and games like Saturday make me wonder where on earth our next win will come from. You could say that there’s a positive in that our next two games are against teams in the bottom two of the table. Surely we can get at least one win against Harlow Town or Burgess Hill Town? Then you realise that this is Kingstonian, the same club that has in recent weeks been pasted at home by teams who were in the bottom two in the table, Whitehawk and Wingate & Finchley. Rule nothing out, rule nothing in.
The speed that Dean Brennan has almost completely changed our squad has left my head spinning. At least on Saturday I could tell which player was which as the numbers on the home shirt can be read from a distance longer than one micrometer away. So at least I got the feeling that maybe player A is ok, player B looks like he can be better, etc., etc., but overall I still haven’t a clue what to think because I’m still extremely dizzy with this spinning head issue. My head should have been spinning like this a lot earlier, after all we haven’t had a settled squad for at least two and a half years. How on earth do we expect the K’s to be challenging for anything positive if that’s the case?
I felt the energy disappearing on Saturday in precisely the same way that it did when we lost to Potters Bar Town in the penultimate game of the Leigh Dynan era. I was bored, I really wanted to be elsewhere, we looked so unable to score it looked painful, in fact I have no idea how I didn’t sound as desperately fed up and unhappy on my microphone duties as I was. This has effectively happened too many times in the last two or three years, and it’s demoralising. My kebab on Saturday night didn’t taste good, which is very unusual (and was nothing to do with the kebab house).
What the club needs is for someone to come in from the outside and be an inspiration. Love him or hate him, Alan Dowson did that, he was a whirlwind when we joined the club, blew us apart when we were covered in cobwebs, woke us up out of a slumber, forced us to not heap pity on ourselves (is this sounding familiar?) – not only did he inspire his players but he did the same for the staff as well. Blimey, the way he spoke to me at times, I could have gone on that pitch and done much better than my feeble best. It would have physically killed me (literally) and would have been no good to the team, but sometimes he made me feel that way.
I’m hoping that Dean can do a similar job as we are in a similar situation, even though it won’t be easy (it certainly feels that I am in a lower trough than I was when Dowse took over from Stuart McIntyre). Organising the meet the manager thing is an excellent idea, though Rosey and I will not be going as we will be driving up to Harlow on Friday night (frustrating seeing as I still haven’t met Dean yet, desperate as I was to get the heck out of the ground on Saturday), and Dean has been impressive in his three interviews so far with Taimour and Jamie. He seems like a no-bull type of person (which possibly explains some of the high turnover of the players since taking the job) who will, to use a Dowse-ism, work his socks off to get things done. We need someone to drag us kicking and screaming out of our panic room whether we like it or not, maybe Dean is the guy.
I’d be lying if I said that I was looking forward to the trip up to Harlow (our current run of form plus my loathing of travelling equals too many overwrought thoughts), but maybe we can have a game in which the players don’t go up to their team-mates just before kick-off and ask them their names, a game in which the men in yellow (for we will not be in the hoops against a team that wears red at home) work their cojones off for their own self-pride if nothing else, a game in which it can feel ok to be a Kingstonian supporter, a game in which I can lift my head above the parapet and terrify all and sundry with a primal scream.